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It was years ago when I first noticed the tiny italicized script in my bible, gently breaking up David’s words in Psalms. I didn’t think of it much then, but when Selah jumped out at me again a few years ago, I had to find out what it really meant. Turns out, Selah is just a way of breaking up the words. Maybe it’s really just a forced pause - knowing that there was just too much to process all at once, so the author added it in as a small kindness. It doesn’t always translate as a kindness, though. Sometimes Selah is annoying and confusing. The gift of a forced pause- to process or grieve or struggle or question- can be uncomfortable at best. And yet... -
There’s been a lot of Selah happening in my heart this year (maybe you’ve noticed?): the forced pause, the breath between sentences, the uncomfortable rest, the whisper of silence. It’s been a theme this year, and one I don’t take lightly - mostly because it’s quite possibly the most uncomfortable I’ve been. Perhaps none of us like silence but maybe we all are in desperate need of it. All I’m trying to really say is this: Selah is good and Selah is needed. You don’t need to love it in order to embrace it, and you certainly don’t need to wish for it in order to believe in it. A paused calling doesn’t mean the calling no longer exists and Selah shows us that breaking up the words in our own lives lets us uncover deep meaning. That being comes before doing. That Selah seasons can be equally good and equally hard. Don’t run from Selah, friends, no matter how confusing, or frustrating, or lonely it can feel. Because sometimes the Author uses Selah as a small kindness, and sometimes that can change the everything.
Learning to be obsessively grateful, starting with him. 💕#1000gifts #thegoodlist #getaftergrateful⠀
The world is full of unexpected beauty. The irony is, when I fill my life to the brim, with no time to breathe because I believe that it is actually possible to experience every last bit, I end up missing so much of it. #ministryofpayingattention
Three years ago today. We didn’t really know what we were getting into, but, to be fair, we knew we didn’t know. We couldn’t foresee that our story in these first three years would hold job loss or uprooting our home or a complete career shift or two cats or a mustache (😖) or a life that looks much different than our friends. We didn’t know that but we knew we didn’t know and we still said yes and there’s just so much beauty in that. Those three little words jam packed full of holy and hard intermingled so powerfully.
And if there’s one thing I’ve learned in marriage thus far, it’s how desperately I need grace. I’ve found that what they say is true: marriage is meant to make you holier, not happier. Which, of course, stings most days when you are forced to ask yourself, “am I really as gracious and loving as I’m portraying myself?” But I’ve also found that, when being married to a man that pours out undeserved love and grace, there’s also a whole lot of happiness mixed into that holiness. And that’s why marriage is also a hint of heaven. I’ll say yes a thousand times to you, Cal Meyer, and then a thousand times more.
I’ve felt really busy lately- like really busy. And when life seems like chaos on all sides, my brain starts threatening to shut down. I create less, I write less, I pray less, and I don’t dive into Scriptures as often. I get mega focused on that “one thing”, and I start using my busyness as an excuse. It wasn’t until I took a long look at my heart that I realized I’m always “busy”. Life is always “chaos”. There is always that “one thing I have to do”. (Side bar: being an enneagram 7 doesn’t help. Read: always looking for excitement and fun). But it’s only when I understand the inner-workings of my heart, that I realize that I have a choice. We all do. A choice to do or a choice to be. A choice to go or a choice to reset. It’s time we stop waiting for the right time to rest. (Spoiler alert: there will never be a “good time” to take a break.) Because it is in the space of consistent, disciplined, and unhurried rest (albeit even just 5 minutes a day) that we can truly proclaim “it is well”.
#preachingtomyownheart right now when i say this: when we are inwardly focused, we begin fixing instead of repenting. scrubbing down our own souls, we start trying to make them bright white all by ourselves. since it’s impossible to wash our own selves clean, we then begin to minimize our wrong doings, shouting into the void, “but I’m a good person!” it’s here that we find ourselves no longer in need of a Savior. because after all, we’ve convinced ourselves that we don’t need fixing. and Christ becomes small in our minds- insignificant and lost on us. it’s only when we fall to our knees again that we realize that there’s not a bucket big enough to wash away our own yuck. it’s here that we remember and it’s here that we experience the supernatural grace that radiates in the dark night. because the bigger we see our sin, the bigger we see our Savior. and the more undeserving we see ourselves, the more we see His mercy.
Packed the days in with hiking and sushi and non-stop weepy-laughter and takis and weird monkey videos and life and wine and joy. They teach me that long distance doesn’t have to change one single thing and that big/wild/loud is worth celebrating and life is a life lived when you belly laugh your way through it. If relationships are the currency of life, then I am one rich lady. 💕 #getaftergrateful #bestiesfortheresties #hanganindenver
He is wearing the same cologne he wore on our first date and I just really like him 😍 #marriedup #beating50percent #stayingido
“Listen, He is the prize. Not His direction, guidance, and clarity, not even His comfort, relief, and encouragement. Just Him. He is the One who encompasses all you are searching for.” -Priscilla Shirer
Oneness in the Spirit overpowers our fickle hearts to learn joy and peace and hope and contentment. The key is to remind our hearts of who we are in Christ, and all that we will be in Him. Because even the best things in this life are just dim hints of what’s to come.
PSA: it doesn’t matter where you live, how many mountains you hike, the number of Patagonia fleeces in your closet, or the size of your tribe - we’re all a little bit broken and a whole lot in need of a Savior.
The hardest pill for me to swallow in marriage has got to be the sacrificial complement of it. Joy and sorrow often intermingle, both showing up in clenched fists and surrendered plans. Undying sacrifice in relationship is the story of two people racing alongside one another, but my selfish impulses can often a different tale. -
It’s rarely our natural instinct to put others before ourselves, despite how deeply we love the other person. The tendency is to glaze sacrificial love over with talk of boundaries and self care but sometimes what we are really saying is: you are not enough. That that person, whoever they may be, is not worth sacrificing for. That they are not worth giving all for. That they are not worth loving deeply and without reserve. And we so often forget that this lens is not what Jesus saw when he looked at us. -
Broken, hurting, and in desperate need of a Savior, He saw US worth sacrificing for. Every want and every desire he had- he gave up for the sake of love. So the question should never be, ‘how much is enough?’, it should always be ‘what would Love do?’ Because love isn’t scraping by, wondering when we will get our turn. Love is learning to sacrifice, despite the cost; no matter the cost.
When the Sunday scaries hit full force and the Monday to-do list starts piling up, I’m reminded once again that there’s no way I can do this alone- and I’m not meant to. The more jam packed my schedule is, the more surrender is required. We were not made to squeeze God into our calendars, but when the life feels squeezed out of us, to pull back and purposefully remember our purpose. The busier we are, the more intentional we ought to be. Join me?
The difference between believing in God and believing God begs for a priority shift. Believing in God allows us to live our lives with a greater Being governing above. Believing God calls us to radically shift our own thoughts, ideas, and values. Believing in God focuses strictly and solely on the end reward. Believing God gives us the freedom to press unashamedly into His character- His kindness and goodness and gentleness. Knowing and understanding the fullness of who HE is then gives US permission to live loved more fully alive.
heshomeheshomeheshomeheshome 😍🙌🏼 after two months away, all is right in my world again. #pilotcal
Amidst the many transitions and the raging hormones that seem to be marked by the late twenties. The compulsive need to plan every last detail for the next twenty years. The illusion of busyness to pretend there is not accountability in saying no. Pressing hold on the things tugging at my heart simply because it is not the right time. The discernment that comes with no (especially when you really really want to say yes). I’m an addict to experiences and simplicity requires a deep contentment in what is already there. It’s a funny thing, to say no now for a better yes later. But we have a say. We can choose the illusion of control or the discomfort of rest. Stripping our idols of more and learning to breathe in less. It’s a heart thing. And we get to choose.
Reflecting this morning on how we got to where we are and the risk involved in getting here. We jumped through a lot of hoops and made a lot of tough decisions in the past year. -
But just because we risked, doesn’t mean we are owed anything. Cal isn’t guaranteed a pilot job, no matter how hard he works. We aren’t entitled to a house or family, despite how much we save or plan. Success isn’t owed to us just because we’ve sacrificed. -
Faith is trusting His good over ours, even if His good looks very different than ours. Faith isn’t risking for an earthly reward; it’s risking despite any earthly reward. Even if it doesn’t play out the way we imagined. Even if we risk everything and don’t see the fruit. After all, our hope isn’t in anything we obtain here in this earth. Heaven is, and always should be, what holds our hope. #wordsfromthewindowseat
Too often we treat rest as an excuse to overindulge or an “every once in awhile” splurge. True rest most often takes discipline by creating a space that we continuously set aside on a regular basis. The kind of rest that ignites our souls, resets our hearts, and presses us to become alive. To be fully who we were created to be, we must first take time to obey the practice of Sabbathing. It may mean saying no to the things we truly want to invest in, but a no now is a better yes later. Intentionally pouring in to intentionally pour out.
1. More often than not prayers aren’t answered when or how we want them to be. But sometimes they are answered swiftly and quickly and when that happens, it’s like heaven reaches down to embrace us and it feels absolutely holy.
2. We don’t know what others having surrounding them. When there’s a choice, always choose giving the benefit of the doubt.
3. Drinking beer out of a wine glass, although more classy, is infinitely inferior to actual wine.
4. There’s a hazy line between boundaries and emptying ourselves like Christ did. I’m learning the balance.
5. Asking questions is essential to understanding. #hashtagfivethings
Our natural self is always defying our righteous self. What I mean is this: when we are saved by Christ, the war within us turns up a notch. Satan does NOT concede easily, and His sole purpose is to drive you out of Jesus' arms, and into his own. It's a scary, slimy game he plays. One of his main tools is to show you how scary and slimy your own heart is. Our natural, sinful selves that make us want to hide under the covers and give up all hope. Confidence is not attainable when we forget who we are: saved, not slimy. Redeemed, not repulsive. Loved, not left behind. The key is to turn our eyes off ourselves and on to Him. We cannot be strong in who we are until we first know that we are the beloved.
NEW ON THE BLOG: 5 simple ways to boost your confidence. Because what if confidence is not a thing to be had, but a thing to be worked for? #linkinbio